I gained 2.2 this week.
No I don’t want to talk about it or be told that it’s not too bad or that it’s the holidays or anything else. So please don’t do that.
I’m getting back on track and I’ll get over it. Right now I just feel like crap and want to just be left alone.
Food holds an incredible power over me, as I’m sure it does most people. I’ve been working hard to eliminate that because it’s food. It’s not my child. It’s not my family. It’s not even my friend. I consume it, it makes me continue living. End of story.
Something I’ve really struggled with since I began WW is feeling guilty. If I eat out and have something that’s not a great choice, I feel guilty for eating it. If I have a T*wix bar, I feel guilty for eating it. If I have a little more than I should of something, I feel guilty.
This past week we’ve eaten out a lot, simply because we’ve been traveling. There haven’t been a lot of great options in most of those places especially when we were traveling from NY to NC, and I found myself really beating myself up over the fact that I had a cheeseburger at a fast food place or that I was eating a sugary snack in the car. We have a lot of candy left from our stockings, and yesterday I had a PB T*wix bar. After I ate it I was immediately feeling horrible.
And I need to stop doing that.
It’s one thing to eat something and tell myself, ‘That wasn’t a great choice. You’ll probably see that on the scale Saturday’ and another thing entirely to tell myself, ‘What were you thinking? I thought you were sick of being a fatty!’ I cannot continue with the mindset that I’m a bad person for allowing myself to eat the things I want. I’m an adult. It’s not like I eat cheeseburgers or candy all day long every day. I’ve lost 33 pounds since July. I’m doing good things for myself. I need to be more cognizant of that when I want to kick myself for splurging a bit.
So there’s some food for thought. Do you beat yourself up when you over do things or when you make a not-so-great choice? How do you stop doing that to yourself and realize that it’s just food and nothing to kick yourself for?
I went to weigh in last week on Thursday and had gained .8. I was bummed, but I knew that with everything I had eaten, and all the activity I had not gotten that .8 was an incredibly lucky thing. I decided awhile back if I could get through Christmas without gaining 5 pounds I would be happy.
The past week has been so incredibly busy. My boyfriend and I traveled to New York on Tuesday for the holiday, and the rest of the week has been just full of so many things to get done. It’s also been full of food choices that weren’t “good”. I didn’t gorge myself on anything, but there’s been a lot of temptation and I promised myself I wouldn’t sit here being miserable and telling myself “You can’t eat that.” So I didn’t.
I weighed in at the meeting I first began in way back in July. It was incredibly good to see the leader of that meeting, as well as some of the members. They all told me that I looked great, which was very nice to hear. Also nice about the meeting? I lost .4 this week. Don’t ask me how that happened, but I will absolutely take it with pride. I lost weight over Christmas. Seriously. Totally awesome.
Today the boyfriend and I took a trip to the mall to exchange a gift and then use a gift card that I got. I bought several shirts and two pairs of dress pants, and I also got a pair of jeans in a size smaller than what I have been wearing. I got them because they were on sale, thinking that they would be good motivation to have around. I figured I could be in them in another month or so. Well, I tried them on when I got home from dinner and they fit. Easily. I’m thrilled. So I can absolutely go down a size in jeans, which makes two full pants sizes now. Totally awesome.
It’s going well. My goal now is to get right back on track when we’re back in North Carolina with working out and really following the plan with food. I would like to lose 15 pounds in the next 12 weeks, which will take me below 200 pounds for the first time in about three years. It’s a good and reasonable goal.
The past few weeks have flown by in a blur. Last week I missed WW due to being out of town at a friend’s house. I weighed in on Thursday this week and had gained .8. I’m not letting it get me down, as my back has been out and then I had bronchitis. On top of all that, it’s Christmas and every five minutes some child was offering me a piece of candy, or there was a holiday party or a dinner out… I take into account no working out and all that extra food and I realize that I have done alright. This is also the first time that I’ve gained in a very long time.
I did not weigh on Saturday this week because I’m out of town again. My next meeting will be next Saturday while I’m in NY. Keep your fingers crossed that I do OK over the big Christmas holiday. I fully intend to make good use of the tredmill at my parents’ house while I’m there.
This has been an incredibly difficult week. For the first time in a very long time, my back has gone out. I have a herniated disk between L4 and L5, caused by lifting a box improperly two years ago. I’m sure that my weight did not help that injury along either. Since I’ve started WW I’ve had no problems. It’s been great. Saturday while I was at a friend’s house scrapbooking, I started to feel the tell-tale symptoms that my back was going to slip out. I did what I could to prevent it, but by late Saturday night/early Sunday morning, I was in a great deal of pain.
It’s gotten better as the week has gone on. Today the only real issue is the continued pain in my right leg. Sciatica is fun. I’m much more mobile and feel like myself again.
The damage has been done though. I was unable to do anything all week; simply getting up from the couch or rolling over in bed was agonizing. So no walking, gym, or aerobics dvds thus far this week. It’s been frustrating; I had planned to work really hard to get down another 1-2 pounds.
To top it all off, I’ve discovered that pain is a trigger for me. I’ve eaten things that I haven’t even been remotely tempted to eat the last 5 and a half months. We went to breakfast on Sunday morning at a buffet, which hasn’t been a problem previously for me. Sunday I had bacon, cheesy potato cassarole, and a cinnamon bun. Awesome. I had a couple doughnut holes yesterday. I’ve been very lax about writing down my points. I’ve been snacking on junk.
Now, my clothes are all fitting fine. Nothing is tighter. Everything in that respect is alright. I’m fully expecting the scale to punch me in the face when I step on it Saturday morning. I know we all have weeks like this, but I’m frustrated with myself that I let physical pain manifest in eating poorly. I know that I should have made even better choices this week than I usually do, to compensate for my back being completely useless.
We’ll see how it goes.
Oh weigh in the week of a holiday. Dread.
I had done everything I could this week to try and balance out the food on Thanksgiving. I worked out three times. I tried very hard to plan ahead and stay within my points. I was very proud on Thanksgiving of my choices and how I ate. I decided on my way to the meeting today that no matter what the scale said, I would be proud of myself. I knew that I hadn’t over eaten this week, even on Thanksgiving. I had worked out. I had done everything I possible could to take care of myself and make healthy choices.
I stepped on the scale with a grimace, ready for bad news. Then I heard, “You’re down.” I asked how much. She said, “You’re down 1.6.”
No. Friggin. Way.
Apparently my work at the gym paid off, or my food choices actually were as good as I thought they were. I really didn’t expect it, but I’m so very proud of myself. I lost in a week when it is fully expected that you’ll gain or maintain.
I would really like to lose another 7 pounds by the time I go home for Christmas. That would put me down a full 40 pounds, and I’d love to have that to show to everyone. I’m not sure that’s realistic, but I want to try to get as close to it as I can. We’ll see how it goes.
My back is trying to go out, for the first time since I started WW. I’m going to go to bed early tonight in an attempt to thwart that.
I was nervous about Thanksgiving, knowing how hard it would be to resist some of the temptations that would be on the table.
I’m happy to say that it wasn’t nearly as difficult as I thought it would be. I think it’s because prior to this year, I never really took the time to measure my portions. When I first was looking up portion information for things, I was upset because it was like 1/2 cup of stuffing for 4 points. I was just wondering how I’d get through the day without going over my points by a whole lot.
As it turns out, 1/2 cup of stuffing is a lot of stuffing. The only thing I took seconds of was a roll. After we ate I was incredibly full. I’d had everything I wanted, including a piece of pumpkin pie. I didn’t even need to eat dinner (we ate early in the day). I had one more piece of pie, going over in my daily points by like 3. I think that’s a pretty big success.
I’m somewhat surprised by the whole portion thing. I never realized before just how much I was eating. Measuring everything has really opened my eyes to the fact that most of the time I was just eating far too much. I’m really glad that I have this skill now.
So Happy Thanksgiving everyone. I hope you had as successful a day as I had.
Today I was almost pantsed by a first grader. He was hugging my leg because he didn’t want me to leave class after my lesson. I realized suddenly that my pants were slowly being pulled off of me.
I nearly flashed a whole classroom full of first graders because my pants are too big.
So it’s official; I need new pants. Preferably before I scar a room full of impressionable children.
It was an OK weigh in. Our usual meeting leader wasn’t there, which is always a huge disappointment. Nobody runs a meeting like Tonia.
I was actually down .6 this week, which came as a pretty big shock. It’s not the greatest number, but it’s a loss. I’ll happily take it, considering it was not expected.
I look back again to my process, and it really is true that I go 3-4 weeks with very solid losses. After that I have a low loss. Then I get back to between 1-3 pounds for several weeks. It’s something that I need to know about myself and accept about myself, because that’s apparently how my body needs to do things.
This is the start of m 20th week of WW. I’m proud for my committment to this.
I think sometimes when you’re working toward weight loss goals, you get caught up in the scale. Your whole world revolves around what the scale will say. You walk into your WW meeting, or you wake up in the morning and when people ask you how you are your immediate response is, “Ask me after I get off the scale!” Your happiness (or lack thereof) becomes solely about what the numbers on the scale say.
I’ve been guilty of this. If I don’t see a “good” loss, I get a little discouraged. If I don’t see any loss, I’m really discouraged. And the one week I gained, I was absolutely devastated. The scale told me things I didn’t want to hear, so I got discouraged and depressed.
I think it’s important to think about Non-Scale Victories (NSVs). There are so many things that you accomplish that have absolutely nothing to do with the numbers the scale flashes at you. I started thinking about it this morning, and I have a whole list of NSVs from the last few months that I’ve been doing WW.
I could go on and on about all the NSVs I’ve had. I think that it’s important to make myself think of these things, because otherwise I would just focus on the scale and what the numbers say. I really believe it’s so important to look at all the other wonderful things I have accomplished.
So what are you NSVs? What have you accomplished since you started your weight loss journey that has nothing to do with a number on the scale?